It’s a Small World After All

During a recent online date that was going so well it makes you forget all of the
disastrous dates in which you partook to get to this awesome one, my handsome, funny,
smart, and engaging date said something that left me momentarily stupefied.

“I don’t mean to embarrass you,” he began, ” But you winked at my brother after you and
I started emailing.”

[Read more…]

The Bad Online Date That Really Happened

In honor of the holiday season, I offer a lighthearted comic interlude for all you singles
and looking – an oldie but goodie extracted from an online outing in which I partook
several years ago.

Disclaimer: His profile appeared normal. No red flags were detected.

We met downtown one evening at a coffee shop. He couldn’t find the coffee shop, even
though I gave him the exact cross streets, but a number of texts and phone calls later he
overcame his spatial incompetence to meet me.

[Read more…]

Not Interested? Not Interested in Hearing About It.

You’ll find that Match.com offers you the option of sending an automated “No thank you” to an interested wink-er. “Not interested?” it asks when it sends you an email notification that you’re the recipient of a wink.

“Give Dork43920 [not a real user name that I know of – apologies if this happens to be your user name] the courtesy of knowing you’re not interested. Say ‘No Thanks.’”

[Read more…]

Seek and You Will [Hopefully] Find

Have you noticed that the set-up of these online dating sites gives you the impression that you don’t have to work that hard? After all, if your preferred online dating site is so dedicated to your search for an e-lationship, what do you need to do besides sit back, stretch your legs, cross your arms, and wait to click on the perfect match sent by your site?

[Read more…]

FriendFinder Review

FriendFinder

FriendFinder is one of bigger online dating sites, boasting over 1.4 million active members on its site. The main site has limited niche group involvement, but there is one click access to the other niche sites under the FriendFinder umbrella if you’re looking for a specific demographic to date. The site design is a bit busy with things stuffed together on one page and it takes some studying to understand what everything actually is. Even when you do figure it out, it is still too much on one page and I wish they did some streamlining to their site to make it easier to navigate.

The FriendFinder profile is nothing special to look at. It is really just a picture and text boxes. The questions asked are not thought provoking ones, but are generic “tell us about yourself” types of questions. The basic stuff (hair, weight, eyes, etc.) are the only things that are covered in any depth. Again, the profile suffers from too much info jammed onto one page. However, it is fully functional as you can send email, upload photos, send flowers, send bling, and read the profile all from the same page.

The search function is interesting in that you can only do a basic search as a non paying member. In order to search by more specific terms, you must pay to upgrade. Even then, though, there is nothing really special or creative about the search function. You can see who’s online now and who is new in your area, but that is about it. The search engine is one of the least busy pages on the whole site, though, and that is a good thing.

There are virtually no free benefits. You can create a profile and perform a basic search. FriendFinder has a tiered paid membership scheme. You can become a silver member for $22.99 per month. This allows you to view and contact members, get higher placement in searches, contact new members, and obtain partial access to blogs, magazines, etc. To become a gold member, you have to shell out $34.99 per month. This give you all the benefits of a silver member plus placement at the top of all searches, full access to magazines and blogs, and access to members’ instant messaging nicknames. Full access to introduction videos and customer support are also included.

FriendFinder Pros

  • Large, popular site
  • Tiered paid membership
  • Niche sites for different demographics.

FriendFinder Cons

  • Busy site design.
  • Very few free benefits.

FriendFinder is not a bad site. It is a little difficult to navigate at first, but you get used to it in time. It is chock full of features, but you need to be a paying member to access most of that. That’s understandable, but to hold back the advanced search functions is not very cool. It is nice that they have a tiered payment plan so that you can determine how much you want to spend, but the prices are high. You would expect the silver package to be a bit more reasonable. Still, it is comparable to other sites.

FriendFinder could easily be a first stop site in the online dating world. It has a lot of features, a lot of members, and is comparably priced. I’d recommend you take a look but with the caveats mentioned above.

“Hey, what are you up to tonight?”

Today’s Online Dating Tip: Send A Real Email.

“Hey, what are you up to tonight?”

“What’s up, beautiful? Any weekend plans?”

“Hey, you wanna chat?”

If you’re the proud owner of any of the above quotes, and you’ve been perplexed as to your vacant inbox after dozens of similarly heartfelt email outpourings, you may want to alter your approach. Because, as a woman, I see those one-liners in my inbox and I translate them thusly:

“I’m bored, and I’m hoping you’re desperate.”

[Read more…]

Wink and you’ll Miss it

Today’s online dating tip: If you’re interested, send an email, not a wink.

Once upon a time lived a lovely young heroine looking for love. She looked left, and right, but didn’t find it. So she opened up her laptop and registered on an online dating site and there it was, staring her right in the face: LOVE! So many online options, she thought woefully, and yet so little time to meet each gentleman in her busy life of prancing about looking for love.

[Read more…]

eHarmony Review

eHarmony Front Page

eHarmony is one of the most popular sites on the internet for dating, boasting 20 million online users. You’ve probably seen eHarmony ads all over your TV and other media outlets touting “deeply compatible” matches. They also boast privacy – no one can just browse your profile unless they are compatible. All communication is anonymous until both parties are ready to share personal information. Interestingly, eHarmony claims that on average, 542 members on the site get married ever day in the United States.

How eHarmony Works

What makes eHarmony unique in the online dating space is its Compatibility Matching System. By analyzing your answers to the in-depth and comprehensive compatibility questionnaire, eHarmony is able to match you up with members it thinks you are likely to have a long term relationship with. This is based on the 29 Dimensions that are critical to relationship success.

Describing the eHarmony questionnaire could take a book unto itself. If you spend the time to answer the questions honestly and accurately, the whole process will easily take more than thirty minutes. So keep that in mind, before you sign up. Questions asks you things like how you resolve problems, what you look for in a match, and lots and lots of questions about your own personality traits.

eHarmony questionnaire

But you aren’t done! Just when you finish, you find your profile is only half-way done. This is where the free form text boxes come in. Here you’ll answer questions about what qualities you look for in another person and standard questions like that. The profile is obviously the strength of this site, but you need to be serious about your answers. This will ensure that eHarmony will return you the best possible matches.

eHarmony does not include the search capabilities that you find on other online dating sites. This is because the only profiles you see are the ones that are matched with you based on your initial questionnaire answers. However, they do offer very interesting personality reports which you can read if your match is willing. You’ll also get access to your own personality profile as well. This is fun, because it gives you insights into who you are, and how other perceive you as well.

eHarmony really has no free features to speak of. While you get a list of matches, you won’t see any pictures of them until you pay. So if you want to use the site to find someone, you will definitely have to shell out some money. Keep this in mind before taking the time to join eHarmony and create your profile.

eHarmony profile

While eHarmony’s membership prices are relatively expensive, I think that’s good because it pretty much weeds out all the non-serious daters. There are a couple of different membership options. A basic member can view photos, request photos, and send/receive communication requests. This is for $59.99 per month, though you can sign up for longer plans at a somewhat reduced rate. A TotalConnect member can get a deeper personality profile, talk on the phone anonymously, and get their personal details verified. This is $44.95 for three months or $134.85 up front.

eHarmony Subscription options

Once you’ve paid your money, you’ll want to communicate with your matches. While you can use the standard eHarmony mail, another option is the eHarmony guided communication feature. When you find a match that you want to talk to, you can use this option to break the ice and get to know your match better. Basically it’s a set of pre-made questions you can select from to send to a prospective match. I know many people find starting that initial conversation to be extremely awkward, so this guided communication can actually be helpful to some.

eHarmony Pros

  • Very detailed personality profile
  • Deeper, better matches
  • More relevant matches, although less choices overall.

eHarmony Cons

  • More expensive then other dating sites.
  • Very little in the way of free features.
  • Requires some time to complete your entire profile.

If you are more interested in casual online dating, and seeing a wider variety of matches, then you may want to look elsewhere. Creating a good eHarmony profile takes time, and not everyone is willing to go through the entire process.

However, if you are looking for a deeper, long term relationship, then eHarmony could be a great fit. While eHarmony prices are high, it is hard not to recommend them because it does work well for its target market. It definitely has the brand recognition, and reputation to attract other serious members who are looking for the same things you are.

If you have some free time, why not give eHarmony a shot?

Chemistry.com Review

Chemistry.com

Chemistry.com is Match.com’s answer to the personality profile online dating engine. You’ve probably seen ads for it on TV and it has also been featured on 20/20 and Good Morning, America. The site works by asking you a lot of questions and seeks to get to know your innermost self. You will also receive a report of your personality in case you were wondering what all of those questions meant. This is all based on the anthropologically research conducted by Dr. Helen Fisher. Taking the personality test only takes about twenty minutes and doesn’t feel “too long”. The site is simply laid out with a soothing blue color palette.

The profile and matching capabilities are obviously what makes this site work. It doesn’t feel as in depth as eHarmony, but it does have some of the same effects. You feel as if you are matching on something other than just what movies you have in common. When you bring up someone else’s profile, it automatically shows your profile beside it. This is a nice touch to see how your personality types and other information coincide. Like eHarmony, there is not way to search for other members, but you are matched according to your personality types. There is quite a bit of information on the site about what each personality type is and how your answers determine it.

There are also some interesting ways to get the ball rolling with a match. One of them asks you to give your opinion on a picture and then asks the same of your match. One allows you to send a list of four items to your match and then he/she will send a list back for comparison purposes. There are three more fun ways to break the ice with your match, but none of this is available for free.

As a free member, you can make your profile and look at your personality scores. You cannot connect with anyone as a free member. As a paying member, you can find out who has looked at your profile, who has shown an interest in you, and unlimited communicating – including emails – with your matches. This service is $49.99 per month, and the price per month goes down with the number of months you purchase.

Chemistry.com Pros

  • in depth personality profile
  • free personality results
  • cheaper than eHarmony

Chemistry.com Cons

  • no free benefits
  • more expensive than other sites

In the personality dating game, Chemistry is a good alternative to eHarmony. Its profile is not nearly as overwhelming and I actually found a couple of good prospective matches on the site. Not only that, but it’s cheaper, so why not give it a try?