Efficient E-Dating

Have you been wondering how to weed through volumes of online profiles that make the Encyclopedia Brittanica seem like a short story by comparison?  Once upon a time, I wondered that very same thing.  And using my highly evidence-based practice of research known as the guess-and-check method (“I guess I’ll go out with him if his background check comes out clean…”), I’ve developed a few time-honored techniques to trim down your online options.

Do not date this person:

  • Relationship status of Currently Separated. He/she is not ready.
  • Significant portions of profile are left blank, including religion, want kids, have kids, education level.

Currently Separated

Granted, there’s no foolproof way around the fact that even in the absence of this telltale red flag, he or she may be 24 hours out of a breakup and looking for a relationship bandaid to ease the pain.  Nevertheless, you’re stepping on a heartmine if you walk into a date with Currently Separated.  Even as I’ve strategically avoided Currently Separated, I’ve exchanged emails with his neighbors, Just Broke Off My Engagement and She Just Broke Up With Me Yesterday.  Conveniently omitting this information from their profile and our email exchanges, I’d typically hear about it in an email that sounded something like this:  “I was really looking forward to our coffee date that starts in 10 minutes, but my ex-girlfriend just texted me and I’m going to drop everything to text her back in hopes she’s changed her mind and we can get back together and live happily ever after.  Oh, I know I didn’t mention her, but she sure is great, you should meet her sometime.”

Incomplete Profile

Could mean one of two things.  Successful online dating requires buy-in; the belief that it can actually work and that the effort one puts in will be worthwhile.  An incomplete profile suggests he or she isn’t taking the process seriously.  The other possibility is that the person with an incomplete profile has something to hide.  Maybe he or she does have kids, but doesn’t want you to know.  Whichever the reason, people who are comfortable with who they are and what they want, and are willing to put their cards on the table for the chance at a winning pair, are going to be your best choices if you’re looking for a good love match.

For more online dating tips, or if you have specific questions you’d like me to address, please comment and I’ll be sure to address your comments in my next post.  Good luck!

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